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Girls

10 Things Guys Should Know About Girls

1. “Nice guys”

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Photo Credit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xfeys7Jfnx8

Have you ever pulled the “I was a nice guy till a girl broke my heart blah blah blah it’s not worth being the nice guy blah I ain’t bout this life no more blah blah”? Stop it – it’s pretty dramatic and unnecessary because real gentlemen do not find being “nice” an obligation. If you think being a douchebag gets you all the girls, you’re only half right. What attracts girls to so-called “bad boys” might be anything from their looks to their confidence. However, at the end of the day, what makes a girl stay would be a man who treats her right. To all the douchebags (and everyone else out there)… Nobody is going to “save” you from yourself. Life is not a movie and people are not medicine. So grow up and be a man of good character. It’s the largest untapped market today.


2. The Friendzone (It’s a pretty cool place, contrary to popular belief)

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Photo Credit: http://www.socialsuccessmastery.com/the-friend-zone.html

You know what’s more irritating than opening a box of “Butter Cookies” only to find it filled with good for nothing miscellaneous flotsam and jetsam? Having to face an onslaught of whiny comments (not to your face – probably on Twitter or Facebook or the grapevine) about being “Friendzoned”, as if it was the most ratchet that ever happened to that person. Since when did making a new friend become such a dreaded thing? Honestly, the best relationships are built on solid foundations that are friendships. If you can’t even be friends with someone, how can you expect anything more? Instead of being bitter, you could enjoy your newfound friendship (that will probably last longer than a hasty relationship anyway). Who knows what will happen in the future? (Hint: the Friendzone is not Hotel California. Keep the faith alive.)


3. Girls & makeup

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Photo Credit: http://afspot.net/forum/topic/3089-ru-hua-tv-variety-show/

We have a love-hate relationship with makeup. Some days, we bounce happily in front of the mirror and draw on our faces that are our canvases, with hands inspired by the beauty of life and an undying passion for perfection that stems from the depths of our souls. Other days, we’d much rather hit that snooze button for an extra 20 minutes and face the world with our natural, blank canvases. Alas, we cannot because our made-up faces have become what you guys are used to and our natural beauty has become too pale/tired/sick for anyone’s tasteL Such heartbreak. Much hurting. Is wow. So here’s a tip: if you see a barefaced girl, don’t say anything because you WILL commit a serious faux pas. Don’t even try complimenting her – we’re not that dumb. Just don’t say anything. Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.


4. Girls & FOOD

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Photo Credit: memecrunch.com

Never make a girl feel like she has to justify or defend her food choices. Period. Whether she’s eating clean or dirty or dieting or cheating or halal or tak halal, it’s really not your business. Unless you see a girl, whom you know has a lethal allergic reaction to peanuts, fixing herself a PB&J sandwich, don’t question. It’s almost as sensitive as asking a gym buff how much he’s lifting and then walking away scoffing. We love our food, be it salads or Happy Meals. Deal with it because #preferenceba.


5. Chivalry

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Photo Credit: http://jonyshuk.weebly.com/blog/hold-the-door-open-for-chivalry

Guys these days sure know how to dress like dapper gentlemen, but do they know how to behave like one? It’s easy to look like a gentleman but walking the talk might prove more challenging. From basic things such as table manners, respect, courtesy and politeness to chivalrous acts of opening doors, pulling out chairs, lending your coats and walking her home have seemed to have dropped way down society’s priority list. And I don’t know why, because these acts are like free coupons to Girls Ville. Don’t be mistaken though, this is not a sure fire way to get a girl. Girls can sniff out sheep in wolves’ skins from 7.3 miles away so we know if you’re just putting up an act to get into our pants (don’t give yourself away and blow your own cover with your constant butt-grabbing @SexGifs RTs either).


6. Grooming

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Photo Credit: urbanpaleo.com

Well-groomed man > ratchet Ah Pek. Clean-cut hair, clear skin, nicely shaved and looking and smelling fresh with a hint of your signature cologne. That’s all it takes to look like you have your life together (even if you really don’t) and differentiate yourself from the coffee-stained singlet wearing, straggly bearded, long nailed coffee shop cheekopek. Nothing’s more attractive than a well-groomed man in a suit tailored to fit. But forget it if you’re going to take longer than us to get ready. We like you looking sharp but you gotta be Mr Gonzalez about it. I know, right? We’re so fussy. Basically, we want you to love us more than you love your own reflections. We want you to be rugged, yet refined. People are selfish and life is a contradictionL


7. When we get angry

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Photo Credit: http://el-doge-es-muy-bueno.tumblr.com/post/66269136218/diddles-r-us-angry-doge

Am I angry? No. Am I being passive aggressive? No. Why am I angry? I’m not.

Takeaway: We expect you be as sensitive and intuitive as us and read our minds when we’re angry. Unfortunately, we have not accepted that fact that you guys just aren’t born that way. Perhaps one day we’ll learn to be less unreasonable or you guys will become “smarter”. Until then, we’re going to continue to get angry for “no reason”.


8. Why we have “nothing to wear”

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Photo Credit: http://bjutie.com/2014/01/27/the-watermelon-dress/

Sometimes you walk into the kitchen, open the refrigerator and exclaim that there’s nothing to eat while staring at the options available. Why? Because you can’t find anything that you actually WANT or CAN eat. When girls put together an outfit, a lot goes through their minds – from the occasion (is her conservative aunty going to be there?), to the weather (it’s 1C too hot for long sleeves), to keeping up with the latest fashion trends (her favorite skirt is “soo BC”), an outfit has to fulfill all these requirements in order to even be considered as an option. Then, we have to try it on to make sure we don’t look like crazy people. If we do, the whole process begins again. Patience, my child…


9. Playing hard to get

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Photo Credit: http://www.mrvolpato.com/

You’re either TRULY hard to get, or you aren’t. If you aren’t, but you’re playing games, we WILL be able to tell and we WILL find it lame (read: tic for tac late replies). So just stay true to yourself. Although there’s something very primal about subconsciously wanting something you can’t have and “enjoying the chase”, showering a girl with attention and showing your affection is still the most simple and straightforward way of expressing interest and hopefully getting reciprocation (back in the day, written statements of intent were sent to love interests in form of letters so nobody wasted anyone’s time playing games). With that said, there’s a fine line between being persistent (which some girls find very attractive) and being a psychopath. You WILL be able to tell if a girl is annoyed with your wooing antics and that’s when you should back off. After all, you’ve made your interest known. The ball is now in her court.


10. In conclusion

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Photo Credit: http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/3pfhy4

If there’s one thing that you should take away from this article at all, it’s that girls are too complicated, you can’t keep up, and you’re still as clueless as when you first clicked this article. But don’t feel bad, half the world is. What you should focus on, instead, is figuring out individual personalities. You can’t apply general rules or facts or statistics to any single person who is as multi-faceted, conflicting and confusing as you are. With time and patience, you’ll be your girl’s own guru.


Article by : Denise Julia Tan
Written on 27 August 2014

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